Corny jokes

[YYZ Skinhead]

A guy says to a girl in a bar, "I sure would like to take you out." She says "Okay." So he shoots her.

 

[Rick]

Q: what do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire ?


A: Frostbite

 

[7greeneyes]

hi Rick :ciao: :welcome: to Marijuana Passion. Thanks for posting here...funny joke :aok:

 

[SmokinMom]

A guy says to a girl in a bar, "I sure would like to take you out." She says "Okay." So he shoots her.

Hahah love!!

What's red, green, and goes 60mph?
A frog in a blender.

 

[SmokinMom]

I don't know who the next great Female USA beach volleyball girl may be, but I bet Misty may trainor.

Bah, lmfao.

 

[monkeybusiness]

two chimps in a bathtub..

First chimp says, "ooo, ooo, ooo, ahh, ahh, ahh"

Second chimp says, "well put some cold in then!"

 

[ozzydiodude]

Why do gorillas have big nostrils?
They have big fingers.

Why does Tigger smell bad?
He's always playing with pooh.


What do you call a defective boomerang?
A stick.

 

[YYZ Skinhead]

Why are people who eat boogers finicky?

They are picky eaters.

 

[SmokinMom]

Why doesn't a chicken wear pants? Because his pecker is on his head!

What has one hundred balls and screws old ladies? Bingo. lmao.

The gerneric name for viagra- mycoxaflopin.

 

[ArtVandolay]

(1) What does the average Texas A&M player get on his SATs?

Drool.

(2) What do you get when you put 32 Arkansas cheerleaders in one room?

A full set of teeth.

(3) How do you get a Nebraska cheerleader into your dorm room?

Grease her hips and push.

(4) How do you get a Colorado graduate off your porch?

Pay him for the pizza.

(5) Why do the Texas Tech cheerleaders wear bibs?

To keep the tobacco juiceoff their uniforms.

(6) Why is the Baylor football team like a possum?

Because they play dead at home and get killed on the road.

(7) What are the longest three years of a Kansas State fottball player's life?

His freshman year.

(8) How many OU freshman does it take to change a light bulb?

None. That's a sophomore class.

 

[Roddy]

:ciao: Art!! Good to see you around, my friend!

 

[SmokinMom]

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

What did the digital clock say to the grandfather clock? Look grandpa, no hands!

 

[YYZ Skinhead]

Which came first, the chicken or the egg?

The rooster.

 

[Marsrover1]

a man is speeding down an old country road, when he sees red lights in the mirror, so he keeps going for a bit, he at last decides to pull over, cop comes up to the window says buddy your in deep S#@t unless you got one ive never heard befor, the speeder says "last week my wife ran off with a cop i thought you were trying to give her back" have a nice day sir was the cops reply and he took off

 

[SmokinMom]

Excellent, mars! Hahahahahah.

 

[drfting07]

Two friends were sitting on a park bench. They went together to walk a dog. As they are watching him play, the dog sits down and starts licking his own stink star. The friend of the dog owner tells the man "I wish i could do that"

The owner responds "HE'LL BITE YOU!"

 

[astrobud]

what did the duck say when the pharmacy gave him some lip baum. put that on my bill... ta da

 

[ArtVandolay]

Why do birds fly south for the winter?





Because it's too far to walk.

 

[SmokinMom]

What kind of weapon do bees use? BB guns .

What do you get when you cross a sheep and a bee? A bah-humbug.

What is invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts.

Why wouldn't the shrimp share his treasure? Because he was a little shellfish.

 

[SmokinMom]

If a 'Fly' had no wings is it a 'walk'?

Exercise is a dirty word.
Every time I hear it I wash my mouth with chocolate.

Crowded elevators smell different to midgets.