The Original Old Farts Club

[SubmarineGirl]

The left hand works good too

So they say

 

[Tattered Old Graywolf]

Yes Sir a Bidet is the only way to go, mine is wired for cold water only
really wakes me up better than coffee.
That blast in the asss of what a feeling of being sparkling clean

Mine is cold water too and all that is needed. It is a simple bidet hose that I picked up in Tunisia, where all bathrooms have them, except for my hotel which had the standard fixture with gold trim, surrounded by marble.

 

[SubmarineGirl]

Cold water? Our cold water is very cold especially in the morning…burr

 

[Tattered Old Graywolf]

Looking through those pictures I found this one that Big should love. It was shot from my hotel balcony at sunset one day. Tunis is pretty close to the equator, so the sun appears large.

 

[Tattered Old Graywolf]

Cold water? Our cold water is very cold especially in the morning…burr

There are times when nothing could be sweeter!

 

[SubmarineGirl]

There are times when nothing could be sweeter!

Well they always say don’t knock it till you’ve tried it so I’m just saying I’m not knocking it…

 

[Hippie420]

that looks to be flowers…not the best example , but yeah , a toilet paper holder

try an apple


this is the kind of hash we smoked back in the day…just a little chunk in the pipe about the size of a bb and we were good for 5-6 tokes
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lots of bowls one can make

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Used a lot of beer/Coke cans back in the day.

Alcohol​

When I drink alcohol every says I'm alcoholic. But when I drink Fanta no one says I'm fantastic

Alcoholics go to meetings. I'm just a drunk.

Didn’t know they had toilet paper rolls way back then

Corn cobs make good pipes, too.

I have a really “green” friend that uses family cloths. They are cut up tshirts and other soft fabrics that are used then put in a special container that are washed and reused. They also have regular paper for folks like me that wind up in there and see their setup for the first time…. She says she buys very little toilet paper and it saves trees. I have to admire that family they have very little recycle as they go out of their way to reduce their footprint. I don’t buy plastic bottles and I do recycle but I have my limits I guess…
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Shhhh! Walt will hear ya.

Yes Sir a Bidet is the only way to go, mine is wired for cold water only
really wakes me up better than coffee.
That blast in the asss of what a feeling of being sparkling clean

I use my waterpik. Gets the meanness outta me.

 

[ness]

I remember once I changed schools, and I went to the bathroom when I went to flush, I couldn't find any handle or push button to flush the toilet. I sat there for a minute then got up and the toilet flushed. I was 10. Freaky to me at the time.

 

[pute]

Back from coffee with the neighbors......time to cut down a plant.

 

[Hippie420]

I can remember the state police toilet paper we had back in school. It was rough, tough, and didn't take shit off no hippie.....

 

[Bubba]

We got naked pictures of you anyway ....

Just answer the door naked. Some swear poo in their hair to "keep people away" from them. That's a bit far though.....

Bubba

 

[RosterMan]

There are times when nothing could be sweeter!

Oh the Burn the burn LOL
Then Relief!

 

[Hippie420]

I need some relief. I've got two cats in heat and I'm the only male in the house. I've seen more displays of feline genitalia than I ever wanted.

 

[Bubba]

I decided to try it after a big girl at work was on it and lost about 100 lbs. I can lose 10 lbs or more on it in a couple weeks if you stick to it. Also a good idea to watch your fats when on it but I admit I dont

I had a guy in my office lose 60 lbs beer belly. Bought one of those finger poker things to measure glucose. Stopped eating ALL carbs.

(I would fail right there btw). Then, he could see when he was in ketosis, where you have run out of carbs to burn, and it starts in on fat. Then, you combine fasting, for 18 hours per day. The time you are asleep counts, so it's a few hours on either end. Lastly, combine exercise, but plan only calls for 2 of the three.

The weight came off steadily, and over time his 60 lbs gut was gone. It's been a couple of years and hasn't gained it back. He goes to lunch with us frequently, but if he starts to gain, right back.

He eats a lot of no carb stuff, which I don't know if I could. Some weird nocarb bread, fancy no sugar pop that cost as much as a sixer of craft brew, etc.

Not for me, but it's the ONLY plan I've seen that really works without hitting a wall like most "carbs are the enemy" diet. Fasting and tracking ketosis are key to this plan, as is an Iron will on carbs. This means no alcohol, btw, no breads, no pasta, yeah I would fail.

 

[RosterMan]

Used a lot of beer/Coke cans back in the day.

Alcoholics go to meetings. I'm just a drunk.

Corn cobs make good pipes, too.

Shhhh! Walt will hear ya.

I use my waterpik. Gets the meanness outta me.

OK Funny but Sad story
I was using bidet one fine morning and mine unit is a swing out arm that you control where it hits and a knob to adjust the power flow, (mind you it comes out in pinpoint streams) Now picture this,,,,,,,,,, when my sprinklers are on there is reduced water pressure, and if you are bidet ting when the sprinklers shut off and you have the power flow of the bidet water on low it goes mad high crazy,
Now once this happened I realized to be quick and listen to be ready to shut off bidet FAST.........................
One time it surprised me a and sharp stream of high powered water actually shot up into my anus and cut me 3 inches up inside and I started to bleed. I never said anything I knew it would heal quickly but it hurt like a ***** when it happened.
Fast foward 6 months later at my Doctors for yearly phys, and he does the old cold finger us the Wasso prostate test, and he finds the scar or lump where the wound had healed. I explained to him what had happened and he said no way its a polyp and sent me to the Azz doc. The doctor fingered me again and than scope it to tell me yep you cut you asss and even had a name for it.
My Doctor now asks me how my sex life is everytime I see him.
So be careful folks Bidets can fight back.

 

[RosterMan]

I need some relief. I've got two cats in heat and I'm the only male in the house. I've seen more displays of feline genitalia than I ever wanted.

OH LOL Are they Flagging you to get you to mate with them

 

[SubmarineGirl]

I had a guy in my office lose 60 lbs beer belly. Bought one of those finger poker things to measure glucose. Stopped eating ALL carbs.

(I would fail right there btw). Then, he could see when he was in ketosis, where you have run out of carbs to burn, and it starts in on fat. Then, you combine fasting, for 18 hours per day. The time you are asleep counts, so it's a few hours on either end. Lastly, combine exercise, but plan only calls for 2 of the three.

The weight came off steadily, and over time his 60 lbs gut was gone. It's been a couple of years and hasn't gained it back. He goes to lunch with us frequently, but if he starts to gain, right back.

He eats a lot of no carb stuff, which I don't know if I could. Some weird nocarb bread, fancy no sugar pop that cost as much as a sixer of craft brew, etc.

Not for me, but it's the ONLY plan I've seen that really works without hitting a wall like most "carbs are the enemy" diet. Fasting and tracking ketosis are key to this plan, as is an Iron will on carbs. This means no alcohol, btw, no breads, no pasta, yeah I would fail.

It’s really not that bad if you use it for a maintenance. I don’t like the fake breads with no carbs but staying on it for a couple weeks when you’ve been bad like me sometimes takes off a quick 10-12 lbs

 

[RosterMan]

I need some relief. I've got two cats in heat and I'm the only male in the house. I've seen more displays of feline genitalia than I ever wanted.

Tie their tails together and hang em over a clothes line

 

[SubmarineGirl]

Tie their tails together and hang em over a clothes line

 

[Hippie420]

Had a neighbor that bragged about doing that when I was a kid. He was a full grown man, father of four. He died at 46 with pancreatic cancer. Karma?