Awright, Iguana tell you a story. I had watched a few of those films where Floriduh iguana hunter-removers go around with airguns dispatching the prehistoric bastages... I noticed that at a certain size, they declare the dead lizard as being "eatin' size".
Well, as I type this, I could lay a hunnert dollar bill on the desktop as a bet: I can go out right now, and walk 300 feet. And I will see at least one, mebbe up to five iguanas strung out along the canal bank. No iguanas, I lose the bet. <-- Don't take me up on it.
They are friggin'
everywhere. Their only natural enemies might be gators and ospreys.
So one of them had the friggin' temerity to wander down the fargin road, and come swaggering across MY front yard. I grabbed the nearest pistol, and shot the sumbitch in the head. He wuz eatin' size.
I decided to try some.
HAH. The hide on an iguana is very thick, tough, and supple. My sooper filleting knife would
not cut it. I had to use tin snips to get a hole started. <--
TINS!
Took me 40 minutes to get one hind leg cleaned. I figgered that was enough, since I could probably get about fifty pounds of iguanas if I walked to the canal with my pistol.
Fried it up.
God. What a disgusting, wretched, tough, miserable piece of yuckmeat. I'd rather eat kimchi that had gone once through a camel. I can see why they are proliferating -- if the icky bastages tasted like KFC, they'd be fargin extinct.
But they taste like burned popcorn mixed with dirty sneakers pulled from the belly of a putrefying anteater.