is it to soon

[rasta]

I know this is an mj site but I don't face book or twitter so ill ask here ...my daughters are getting worried about me .my husband has be gone now for over 4 years and I have become a recloses in my home ,,some days I get very lonely and would like company someone to spend time with, at time same time it just does not feel right, is it wrong to look for someone or should I wait longer,,,, I miss him everyday

 

[Rosebud]

Hi Mrs Rasta, nice too see you again. I can't of course speak for your husband, but i don't think rasta would be happy that you are lonely. I think he would want you to live your life and to be happy. I don't know if that means another man or what that means but by writing this note, I think you are ready to go out and see friends and start living again. He would want that I think. He was all about peace and he would want that for you. It is ok, you aren't lessening your relationship with rasta by starting to do life again. Think of what you would want for him if this was the other way around.


Glad you stopped in. Always nice to see you.:heart:

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[WeedHopper]

My poor Mother went thru this,,and of course so did me and my sister. My father passed at 36. My poor Mom was so sad. It took her a few yrs but SHE ran into an awesome guy that loves her to death. Never give up on life,,and your loved one would not be happy knowing you are lonely and sad ,,believe me.get out and live life,,its the only one you know for sure you have.

 

[giggy]

rasta i had wrote a long story but it kinda turned into a story of my life. yes get out of the house, join a gym, go out to a club anything that will get you out and going again. my wife was a widow. as far as being too soon. what is to soon to you? lonely is a long long time and not fun. my wife and i were married with in a year of his passing (thanks to her grandmother). not saying that my wife was healed and i some time wondered early in our marrage about how quick things moved, but we have been married 31 years now.

 

[JustAnotherAntMarching]

Hi Mrs Rasta, nice too see you again. I can't of course speak for your husband, but i don't think rasta would be happy that you are lonely. I think he would want you to live your life and to be happy. I don't know if that means another man or what that means but by writing this note, I think you are ready to go out and see friends and start living again. He would want that I think. He was all about peace and he would want that for you. It is ok, you aren't lessening your relationship with rasta by starting to do life again. Think of what you would want for him if this was the other way around.


Glad you stopped in. Always nice to see you.:heart:

:yeahthat: :48:

 

[The Hemp Goddess]

Like Giggy, I wrote this long thing, but on a reread, it didn't quite say what I wanted to get across. So, I will just say that I also believe that Rasta would want you to be happy and living a fulfilled life. Like Rosebud said, think of what you would want for him if things had been reversed. I know that if you look deep in your heart that you will know that he would want you to be happy. And a lonely reclusive life is not a happy, fulfilled life. So your daughters are right--let them help you get back into the swing of life.

I am so glad that you still come visit us here. It is always wonderful to hear how you are doing. Please come back and tell us the new things you have been doing!

 

[yarddog]

You know, I did the same thing. The more I tried to say, it just didn't sound right.
I say give it a try, and do what feels right.

 

[kaotik]

always nice to see you Mrs rasta
you gotta get out there though.. not even to look for love -it will find you when time is right. but just to get out there and not become stale.

i can't imagine how tough it is, but you know Rasta wouldn't want you wasting away depressed missing him.. but to be out enjoying the beauty and life like he so did.

you're always welcome to come chat with us when you're bored though

 

[Joe420Camel]

.

My mother passed first (67), my father grieved so much he had a heart attack within 8 months of her passing.
(lung cancer, fast and UGLY: chemo, surgery, chemo... Metastatic spine, brain, bone... surrender.)
He remarried eventually and about 9 years later, passed also.
Those 9 years would not have been better spent grieving. Nor can I believe my mother would have wanted him to.
I know he never stopped loving my mother and this 2nd (lovely, nice, nothing against her) marriage was more about companionship than love.

---------

The place you have in your heart for Rasta is yours and yours alone.
You have lovingly crafted, manicured and maintained it.
NO ONE can take that away from you.
You can open places in your heart for companionship or OTHER "loves" but nothing has to change that place in YOUR heart for HIM!

Go! Live! Be Happy! Be... ALIVE!

:48:

 

[WeedHopper]

Well said Joe. Very well said.

 

[yarddog]

Yes Joe. My grandmothers second marriage was a companionship too. Separate bedrooms.

 

[WeedHopper]

Hell I sleep in my chair in the living room most the time and we been married 30 yrs.
We like our space and I know where she is at and she knows where im at.

 

[ston-loc]

Hi Mrs Rasta, nice too see you again. I can't of course speak for your husband, but i don't think rasta would be happy that you are lonely. I think he would want you to live your life and to be happy. I don't know if that means another man or what that means but by writing this note, I think you are ready to go out and see friends and start living again. He would want that I think. He was all about peace and he would want that for you. It is ok, you aren't lessening your relationship with rasta by starting to do life again. Think of what you would want for him if this was the other way around.


Glad you stopped in. Always nice to see you.:heart:

Rose said it perfectly. Rasta would want you to be happy. PLR

 

[rasta]

Thank you kind people thank you,,,I will try ,,no he would not want me to be alone and miserable I will keep an open mind and hart ,,,we will see what happens I went kayaking this weekend with my daughter it was great first time out in a while again thank you for you words of support .its nice to not feel alone

 

[The Hemp Goddess]

Good for you! I love the outdoors, water, and Mother Nature. What a great choice for a first outing.

 

[Rosebud]

It is with great sadness that I share a note I got this morning from mr and mrs rasta's daughter. My heart is broken for her.


Originally Posted by rasta
you don't know me ,but im rastas daughter *****,i wanted to say thankyou for being kind to my mom I very sorry to say my mom ended her life several weeks ago .she said she was tirerd of being scared and alone I feel I failed her I was to busy with my own life and did not give her enough attention,,she let a note with several wishes her ashes were spread were my dads were they are toghter now she asked if I would say good by to you and some one called hemp goddess if you would please let this hemp goddess know as it was all I could do to text you with the news again thank u I bid you peace

 

[kaotik]

wow


peace be with you Mrs rasta

 

[Rosebud]

I know kaotik, heartbreaking. Peace be to rasta's daughter. So sad about this.

 

[yarddog]

Oh my, words fail us at times like this.
I hope Mrs. Rasta found peace. Sending good thoughts to her daughter as well

 

[Dr. Green Fang]

Tears are flowing, dang.... I read from the top of this page into Rose's post and it just sucked the air out of me!

RIP Mr and Mrs Rasta. Trying to send you warm thoughts and positive energy Miss Rasta. Please don't take this out on yourself.