The Female Growers Group

[DonJones]

Hick,

While I agree with much of what you're saying, I must disagree with "I can't help but feel that this is simply ridiculous mojave.... there's absolutely no reason for you to NOT feel just as "at home"in the "big boys forum".. COMON' NOW!!" I wish it was true, but unfortunately not everyone is as accepting of "stupid questions that everyone know the answers to" as you are nor as willing to try to help newcomers catch on. Incidentally, you are one of those "elders in terms of knowledge and experience" that I frequently give credit to for why I'm at the point I am.

If I had been less confrontational and aggressive in demanding answers instead of responding to the put downs and other crap that unfortunately will always slip into any OPEN forum when I first started posting here, I would have been discouraged and gone, instead of knowing so much more in a short time than I did when I started here. (I'm sometimes embarrassed when I reread some of my early posts and amazed that as many of the members were patient with my ignorance and were willing to help me learn, especially those times that I just didn't get on simple things until it had been explained several times.)

I know that the line between moderating and censoring is a very fine distinction and not always apparent, and I personally would rather have to ignore jerks until they go away or confront them myself that wonder what the moderators have censored because they don't think I can handle it; but not everyone is that self-confident in who they are or have that kind of "up in your face" personality.

I agree with your basic ideal, and share it too, but unfortunately it isn't an accomplished thing yet. I also agree and know there is no easy answer and the forum only has a limited capacity. In fact I'm often am frustrated too when I get the message that the server is too busy -- try again.

I never meant to upset the apple cart when I asked you what it would take to get another section for the group so the information and issues could be separated out a little better. It seems like we all agree that it was a good idea but it just isn't practical to do given the limited resource available. I also forgot that it would just make more for the moderators to over see.

I guess we will just have to continue to make the best use of what we have and encourage everyone. Personally, I think I'm going ot try to be a little more defensive of people who reveal their lack of knowledge and receive "smart-assed' answers to their serious questions instead of jut trying to answer the question and ignore the jerks in hopes of avoiding a confrontation and that they will eventually go away.

I appreciate the maturity that you have all shown in discussing this subject.

Hick, if I start a thread under DIY, would it be difficult for you to move what Ozzydiodude so graciously moved to the thread under lights, so that the information is actually available in two areas and one can remain more of a tutorial thread and the other one can be more of a personal advice on how to apply that knowledge for those who need more help?

Thanks for whatever help you can give.

Good smoking everyone. This has been a good learning experience for me, and hopefully for others too.

 

[mojavemama]

Ozzy, thank you for doing a new thread for us in the lighting section. That was very thoughtful of you!

But what about the pictures? From now on, I'll post the lessons with Don there, and add my pictures as I go. But what about the first lesson pictures? Can we still add them?

 

[legalize_freedom]

hello, I just want you all to know that this is the first time that I have ever looked in the female growers group, and the only reason that I did was because I read in the introduce yourself section that Don was giving a didactic on makeing a ballast remote.

I always thought of this as a ladies only forum, so I just stayed out (no boys allowed)...and I was actually kind of scared...I have 2 sisters...I know what happens when you enter their rooms!

After peaking in here...I feel kind of gyped, like I have missed out on some really interesting topics...and I even like some of the banter...If ya'll don't mind I think I will pop in here from time to time ...when the other forums are getting slow. I love to hear womens oppinions of things...I was raised by my mother, I trust women, because they don't let ego stand in the way of intelligence. Peace ladies! Nice place you have here!

 

[DonJones]

Ozzy, let me review what you transferred and see if there is anything that I would change. After that I started a new thread in DIY entitled "Mojavemama's HID light conversion" that way there is a tutorial thread under lights and a more hands on walk me through it thread in the DIY section.

Mojave, please hold off for a day or so and let Ozzy and me get the new thread straightened out. I promise we will be back soon, if not in a flash. After your progress you deserve a break any way.

Thanks for the help. GOOD SMOKING.

 

[mojavemama]

Don and Ozzie---tossing smiles, hugs and megathanks your way!

I'll be more than glad to hold off a day or two. I'm a slowwww learner at this stuff. But I'm sure havin' fun.

 

[mojavemama]

Legalize, welcome, welcome, and please DO drop in and say hi when you can.
We do have quite a few very wonderful men who hang out here when they can, as well as some very wonderful female growers. It's not like your sisters rooms--you can peek in here any time and you won't catch us in our undies!

 

[UKgirl420]

hick ,,,leave us poor feeble female growers alone :hitchair: we need all the help we can get ,,nahh only j/k :spit:
but you cannot moan at us because mojave unearthed a little diamond in donjones ,,,,she is willing to share him with the rest of the forum ,and legalize freedom found it :aok: besides i can never find anything in the search feature anyway much easier just looking at new posts ,,
i agree THG it did start out as a gossip thread ,,but i if you read over a lot of the posts it turned into a infomation thread ,pretty quick with a bit of banter in between which goes on in nearly allmost all good threads ,,,

eace:

 

[OldHippieChick]

I need to clarify that I was in agreement with Hick on the search aspect. Searching gets complicated and time consuming when a subject is hidden in a forum. I try really hard to locate a solution to my issues before posting even though it seems to take so much longer.

But I confess, sometimes I read long complicated, even scientific (mad scientist) posts here on this forum and my eyes glaze over around the third paragraph and I just skip onto the next comment. I'd looked into these same lights earlier and emailed a seller to ask questions. I decided they were way to heavy and to much work and I decided to go a more traditional route even though I've seen pics of multiple units used in large growrooms. More power to you Mojavemama for tackling the project and I see that you might not have if Don had not encouraged you.... I'm still not going to go out and buy one even though Don has worked dilligently at posting a tutorial.

Just this week I went back and read up on the original debate on the FGG and just like Hick, I thought this was a social forum (with a bit of depth at times), that if we have an issue and need a pep talk or to be directed to a thread addressing our issues, we'd get the help. I was prompted to do the historical search when I read on ANOTHER (breedbay welcome/introduce yourself) forum that MP is biased and women growers are seen here as some sort of oddity to be humored or tolerated.

I often have internal debates with myself over sexual equality and subtle yet acceptable discrimination. Whenever a man says something like "I like women" or "women are great" I wonder what that statement means to the person who says it. I have a relative who likes women, he thinks every man should own one and in fact thinks a woman needs man because we are incapable of making decisions on our own - if we were not related and I were not a good woman, I'd not tolerate him. My ex loves women - 5 ex wives and 12 children later - he loves em all. But it sounds rediculous to assume that every man is sexist who claims he likes "women" so I won't. But I can't help but notice when a male takes praise well but reacts to a womans advice..... that's not what I call respect.

I can't help but roll my eyes when a person of color gets offended by the statement "I'm not prejudist - I have black friends". What is SO WRONG with that? I DO have black friend and neighbors who I'd trust with my life and I'm not prejudist and I refuse to be put into a box. I judge character based on not only a persons words but their actions as well. But somehow that exact wording is offensive to a portion of the population who feel it's a conviction of racism and nothing that's said is going to convince either of us that the other means no offense. The same holds true on the timeless animosity between men and women.

At the risk of offending you Don, in your first grow room set up here, I immediately commented that your mirrors should be removed. Another grower whos experience is highly respected here (THG I believe?) affirmed my statement. And you responded by defending your position and I admit I took your reply as a "smart *** answer" and it came off on this side of the screen as defensive. So I'm confused when you claim you are going to "start" being defensive. I decided to back off from you and I never would have brought it up if you were not here in the FGG and if you had not gone on on another post about how great we women are. Obviously you and Mojavemama have clicked and found a common interest and that's great. Your mutual adoration has been noted by all I'm sure. And I know it is politically correct to accept both male and female members here, but I'm suddenly uncomfortable so I'm glad Hick brought up the elephant in the room. I think I'm tough enough to take it to the big boys forum.

And if I've exposed myself as having opinions that are not the norm here, so be it.
xox
OHC

 

[4u2sm0ke]

All I can say on th Matter is...I dont care for he s earch engine and I like eing socialble...and if someone braught up and needed help on someting ad find the Fellowship in a group more appealing..then so be it...either way all threads help one another...and as I have seen in the "social" threads great ideas and help...its up to the poster to chose to bring it to the rest of the forrum...Now I know Don Jones would and is...But shouldnt be shoved in that direction...seems to me that its the stff that gets and decides whats good for what section...sounds as though ozzy i doing a great service


ozzy..:48:

Don Jones...Your Awesome:aok:

FGG....:heart:

Hick...:48: Happy Hollidays:ciao:

 

[mojavemama]

I’m feeling pretty low now, realizing I accidentally tripped a bunch of triggers, and started a ruckus. I am deeply sorry. The last thing I ever wanted to do was cause discord in one of my favorite places --the FGG.

And I&#8217;m not sure it&#8217;s quite accurate that DonJones and I have mutual adoration going on. I think if anyone follows my posts in any forum, they would see that I&#8217;m an effusive, &#8220;Oh-WoWWW!&#8221; kind of person by nature. I have gushed and emoted whenever I receive responses that have helped me tremendously, It&#8217;s just the &#8220;Peter Pan&#8221; in me, I guess. I have great respect and admiration for DonJones and his willingness to reach out to help me. But I really don&#8217;t think I save my &#8220;gush&#8221; for him. I am just....GUSHY by nature! I&#8217;d say I&#8217;m more of an &#8220;equal opportunity&#8221; gusher. <G>

OHC, your thoughts on the racial thing sure got me thinking. And as I recall, that phrase --&#8221;I&#8217;m not prejudiced; some of my best friends are black&#8221; --first came into common use during the civil rights era. It was often followed by, &#8220;...but, I wouldn&#8217;t want my daughter to date someone who was black&#8221;, or &#8220;but, I wouldn&#8217;t want my property value to go down if a black family moved in next door.&#8221;

I think that may be where the &#8220;sting&#8221; of that phrase started. And that got me thinking about how some men would quip, &#8220;I love women, BUT....I wouldn&#8217;t want one in the military with me toting a gun--what if she had PMS while her finger was on the trigger?&#8221;

When I post here in the FGG, I have always felt like it was an accepting place, a welcoming place, and the tone of discussion was one of harmony. Women are often the peacemakers, and I&#8217;ve felt at peace here. I&#8217;ve felt comfortable enough to post as a newbie here because of that nurturing and encouraging tone of this forum.

I fully expect as I gain more experience, more knowledge, I&#8217;ll branch out into forums with much more traffic. But here, I feel it&#8217;s safe to wade in the shallow water, even though I don&#8217;t know how to swim, knowing there are a lot of nurturing people here who encourage my fledgling efforts, and will allow me to take baby steps into this new world of growing I&#8217;ve entered.

I just hope I have not been the spark that begins the demise of the FGG.

 

[UKgirl420]

OHC:ciao: i agree with allmost all of what you said ,,but i just dont get why a member helping another member been in this thread is a problem
i must admitt i ask all my growing questions in the main forum (,but i dont feel outta place in here when members are helping each other ,)i have no problem with the male members here i find 97% of them very respectful and curteous(sp)
and to play the devils advocate further
on some of the rare occasions i have felt disrespected its been caused threw female mebers
well im gonna stop typing now as im:fly: rambling and forgetting my point
have a great evening evry1 :48:

 

[UKgirl420]

Mojave ,:heart: i like the peterpan thing ,as im sure many many members here do to ,,you have a knack of making people laugh and feel special in your posts ,,,
so i will bet my FGG membership on it that the demise of the fgg(not that i can see why it would be closed ) would never be because of your posts,,eace:
oops there i go again rambling on :rofl: ohh you know what im saying desert lady
here grab this :48: and let me try out your vape

 

[Hick]

"Never" was closing the club in question... fer cryin' out loud...

 

[OldHippieChick]

Hi UKGirl
I feel that a DIY tutorial belongs in the DIY section. That's as simply as I can state it.
Mojavemama I lovelovelove your Peter Pan ways. xox

I don't get the comment about closing the FGG?

 

[UKgirl420]

"Never" was closing the club in question... fer cryin' out loud...

thats women for you hick hysteria :rofl:







only j.k ladies

 

[mojavemama]

Hick, I didn't say "Close the FGG." I said, "I hope I have not been the spark that begins the demise of the FGG". Quite a difference in meaning.

I made that statement because your post led me to think you saw FGG as mainly a "chat" club for girly stuff, rather than an actual Female Growers Group, where actual serious questions related to growing were discussed.

It seems to me that if we are encouraged to NOT post relavent growing discussions here in the FGG, but in other more "appropriate" forums, where more people can see them, then we are helping the FGG become nothing more than a female chat group, and as such, it would no longer be the forum it is. That is what I meant by my statement. I did not mean to infer you were going to "close down" the FGG, and I don't believe I did that.

However, I do see OHC's point that lengthy, involved discussions such as the lighting discussion--are better taken to a different forum. And that WAS our plan, once the discussion was edited and superfluous banter was removed. That way, when it was posted in the larger forums, it would hopefully be a clearer and more concise tutorial.

But it's a moot point now. I will keep the ballast tutorial to a more appropriate thread.

 

[DonJones]

First of all, The uproar was the direct result of a question I asked Hick in a PM, never even thinking I would cause any uproar.

I asked Hick, "what would it take to get the Female Growers Group a sub forum or section of their won so that they could post threads aobut different topic and keep things separated instead of having to dig through several different conversations all going on at once?" or words very close to that, I don't remember the exact wording and do noot know ho0w to access sent messages.

Then Hick posted his reply here on the FGG thread and we were off to the races.

SO IF ANYONE IS TO BLAME FOR THE UPROAR IT IS ME, NOT MOJAVEMAMA! Sorry girl, I will always take my own blame/responsibility quicker than accepting praise.

Good smoking!

 

[DonJones]

OHC and THG,

I wasn't aware that I was defending my use of the mirrors, rather than simply stating the reasons I was using them. I think if you review that and the later posts you will find that I admitted that mirrors aren't the good things to use in a grow room and once again stated that I was sure that they were better than the dirty beige paint on the walls. I also said that I wasn't arguing about it but that I knew that AFTER I spread the mirrors out along the wall, my problem with lower plant light starvation symptoms disappeared.

If that is being defensive, then I guess under your definition I was defensive, BUT that was NOT my intent and I am sorry that I offended anyone. Incidentally all of the loose mirrors are now in one stack with the reflective side facing the wall and I'm getting ready to pull the one that is fastened to the wall and then paint everything white when I get a chance.

Now to my saying I needed to get defensive, you need to read the entire sentence. I'll try to highlight the operative words in bold and maybe that will better explain what I meant. If not, like always, explain what you don't understand and I'll try to clarify because while I mostly understand what I mean, it isn't always near as clear as I thought it was or even that I said what I meant. Often times when I proofread a post for errors so I can correct them, even I don't get the same meaning I had when I wrote it. that is one reason you may notice that many of my posts were edited and often more than once.

"Personally, I think I'm going to try to be a little more defensive of people who reveal their lack of knowledge and receive "smart-assed' answers to their serious questions instead of just trying to answer the question and ignore the jerks in hopes of avoiding a confrontation and that they will eventually go away.

Does that explain that I was speaking of defending others when wrongfully attacked or ridiculed? If not let me know and I'll keep trying to find a clearer way to say it. Sometimes I get confused reading my writings too.

I like to think that I have matured beyond trying to defend myself, because over and over again I have been taught that "if you are right, then you don't need a defense and if you are wrong, then you don't have one." However, some times I have an overly confrontive tone about my speech and writings that I don't mean to have.

Hopefully this can calm down at least that part of my inadvertent causing an uproar.

Once again, I did NOT mean to offend anyone and apologize for doing so. I'm glad that you brought it up so I could apologize and hopefully explain what I meant.

I'm sure that I didn't give you any idea how much weight I give to both of your opinions.

Good Smoking.

 

[mojavemama]

Awww, and I'm the same way, Don. But I suspect this whole thing today will lead to many good things in the long run. For one, I posted several times today in the Big Boy Forums. Also, I never thought before about how hard it is for people to use the search feature and pull out topics in lesser visited threads. And I also realized just how lengthy our tutorials had gotten, and that such intense discussions SHOULD be in a more appropriate place.

Grinnie---I got back from running the service dogs tonight, and saw our neighborhood LEO out washing his squad car. I stopped to ask him about why he was spiffing up his car tonight, since he never lets it get a speck of dust. He replied, "FULL MOON. That means a busy night. Gotta make sure my car looks good!"

And tomorrow will be a bright new day, and for me, hopefully one that will bring me a fully functioning new wonderful light to make all my plants very happy!

 

[legalize_freedom]

Legalize, welcome, you can peek in here any time and you won't catch us in our undies!

Dang it!!! Never mind then.....LOL...Thanks