Hey guys and gals. Thank you all for the kind words after my last post. For those who don't know; I'm just about at the 20 year mark fighting primary progressive multiple sclerosis. I've been completely confined to a wheelchair and/or my recliner for the last 7-8 years. I'm at the stage now where I'm beginning to lose control of my hands, the left a little more than the right, fine motor skills are really bad and it's constantly blowing my mind how weak I've gotten. Got next to nothing for core strength.
Given the circumstances, it's amazing to me sometimes that I still manage to pull off a grow. I don't keep up with things nearly as well as I should most of the time but, I still enjoy growing even though it can be tough for me. I am seriously considering shutting it down after making one good last run though. We don't go through that much, I can easily jar up enough to last us quite a while. Honestly, it'll likely last longer than me at this rate now. Maybe a lot longer. I've made it very clear for a long time that I won't stick around to be completely helpless, lying in a bed 24/7, having my diapers changed, being fed. No, thank you. I'm just not built for it, it would drive me mad, very quickly. The bad thing is, I constantly get glimpses of it, I'll have a little spell for a couple days or so when it's almost impossible to do anything at all. Just too weak. So, I see it coming. I'm terrified of something happening and taking away my ability to make my own choice too. I want to be here as long as I can, just keep playing it by ear. Anyway, lately, I've started losing interest in doing the forum thing more and more, that's why I'm not around that much. I got a good whining session in anyway...