Before you read this, be warned that you may be offended or upset by what it says.
Legalize_freedom,
I don't think you will have a problem with it, and hopefully anyone who reads past this point will be adult enough to either ignore it or accept that not everyone has the same sensibilities. It gets personal and specific about some of the causes of decreased libido as well as discussing the consequences of self-center behavior outside of good sense and usually acceptable behavior. If you are easily offended or can not deal with beliefs or actions diffeernt than your own, then do NOT read any farther or allow children to read it (although supposedly we are not allowing anyone under 18 on here anyway).
Most sex therapists say that mental/emotional issues cause more lack of libido than physical problems do. From what I have read, if the doctors don't find some obvious physical issue, like impaired circulation of any kind, trauma to the genital area, some time nerve disorder and so no, the odds are decreased libido is due to mental or emotional issues.
Now that is different than ED where the desire and feelings of arousal are normal but the erections either just doesn't happen or are insufficient to perform, which usually has a physical cause. One way to pretty much eliminate physical causes is that if nocturnal or awakening erections occur and are normal in intensity, but immediately collapse upon awakening and do not occur when awake regardless of the stimulation and/or circumstances, then it is probably NOT a physical cause but rather has either mental or emotional origins.
Unfortunately you have 2 off the top three culprits causing low libido, anxiety and PTSD. Stress of any kind and also fatigue are two of the most common causes. Both of your conditions are probably causing you to be fatigued too.
I think, and I'm not a therapist or a doctor, that in your case a calming sedative type of high used over a period of time MIGHT help your libido problem by reducing the stress and fatigue levels. Please check the thread about medicinal strains. Most of the sedative pain relieving varieties also decrease anxiety.
My advice to you because you are probably already receiving physc drugs is to carefully read the side effects and try to assess for yourself what if any good they are doing you. I'm NOT recommending that you just discontinue them without close supervision by some one that can sense an impending episode and take preventative measures, BUT many, if not most physc drugs cause as many if not more problems than they cure. Often one of the side effects is causing the very same thing they are supposedly treating.
Many of the psych drugs list either a change in libido or other sexual changes as a common side effect. First, research every drug you take for side effects -- and just because it says that a decreased libido is RARE does NOT mean that you aren't that RARE person who will experience that side effect. Then discuss the issues that you find with a doctor or pharmacist (the pharmacist usually knows far more about the drug than the prescribing doctor does). Remember "can cause sexual changes and/or problems" can mean nearly anything so you need to try to ascertain just what effects they are referring to. If you need help trying to research your particular drugs, PM me and I'll try to help you learn where to go. I was a 2 year nursing student before I was forced out of the profession by a back injury so I know a little bit about finding and interpreting side effect warnings (I had a full semester of pharmacology and had to research and document the effects and side effects of every drug my patients were taking for the whole 2 years). Everything that has happened in my life has been a blessing over time, even though at the time it didn't always look that way at the time!
My youngest son was recently prescribed an anti-anxiety med that just made him paranoid. He went to the ER a week ago for back pain, and mentioned how he felt on it and what he was taking and the doctor told him it was a good thing he had discontinued taking it himself because that was a serious side effect that often indicated an allergy to the drug that could have escalated into anaphylaxis and possibly even death. I have several friends that take drugs to control mental/emotional issues where the side effect can be an increase in the problem they are taking it for, but it seems to work for them, so your reaction to a particular drug will NOT NECESSARILY be the reaction that you and the doctor hope for. Also, some drugs change their effects when taken over a long period of time.
Another personal experience was with PAXIL. Several years ago when PAXIL was the "hot" anti-depressant, anti-anxiety, seemingly anti anything drug, my wife was put on it without my knowledge. For the next 3 or 4 months she about drove me crazy. She was always horny, which was okay by me, but midway through every experience she would start crying but not want me to stop, swear I wasn't doing anything wrong, wasn't hurting her or that there was any reason why she was crying.
Now I don't know about any one else, but having my partner start bawling in the middle is the quickest way to kill both my desire and my ability to perform -- it is instantly over because if she isn't enjoying it then it is worse than not even doing it.
At first I just attributed it to troubles in our relationship, especially because I was openly keeping a "2nd wife" -- before anyone responds, it was a stupid, cruel and inexcusable thing to be doing to both of the women as well as to my kids and myself -- but after a while I pinned her down about what was going on. She kept insisting that it wasn't any thing that I was doing, and wasn't even the other woman, so I started playing detective. We discussed what had changed at about the same time as this unusual behavior of hers started and progressively got worse. Finally she told me the only thing she could thing of was she started taking PAXIL and " oh, by the way they said it could have sexual effects, either increased or decreased libido." (Of course like the typical self-centered man, my thought to myself -- fortunately I did NOT say it; I was definitely stupid and totally insensitive but NOT suicidal-- "Boy now is a good time to warn me about possible sexual side effects".)
In her case it was increasing her libido but totally blocking her release so here she is taking a drug that made her perpetually horny but kept her from climaxing (which had never been a problem before) so at the same time that she was pushing for more frequent love making, each time it just increased her frustration -- much like women who have partners that are afflicted with premature ejaculation, or as my daughter puts it "one shove love", only in her case the better I performed (and believe me I was trying) the worse it made her frustration. And when I started avoiding love making, because I was frustrated over her crying in the middle and telling me not to stop, that made it even worse because now "you don't love me or even find me arousing any more". CONTINUED
. My level was 373 when I had my heart attack, it is now 118. This was accomplished thru diet, exercise and meds. So imo, real stimulation is a mind game. I had a long conversation with my Dr, and he said " you are getting old, and thats what happens when you get old"
