Island Of Misfits

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But Midget Wrestling is
I worked in a ****o store back around '96. We had a dancer.

One night, she came out front laughing so hard she was crying. The poor girl could barely walk. When I asked her, she could only motion me to follow.

I followed her to her room and looked thru the peephole.

On the bench was a team of six midget wrestlers... 3 on the seat and 3 on the back of the seat waiting for the show 😂😂😂😂
 
Hanging masonite all day. be harder than it looks....

Always wanted a mini bike when I was a kid. Dad wouldn't buy us one. He was afraid that we would cause him to pay med bills. Tight B turd... I showed my boys how to build things. We built gasbikes and go carts. Guess what??? Not a single med bill.

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My Old Man was into surprises. He'd pull in the driveway and ask us to help him get something outta his truck. It would be a gocart or a scooter of some kind. No helmets, no knee pads, no elbow pads. We survived just fine, and had a riot doing it.
 
Hanging masonite all day. be harder than it looks....

Always wanted a mini bike when I was a kid. Dad wouldn't buy us one. He was afraid that we would cause him to pay med bills. Tight B turd... I showed my boys how to build things. We built gasbikes and go carts. Guess what??? Not a single med bill.

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I worked in a ****o store back around '96. We had a dancer.

One night, she came out front laughing so hard she was crying. The poor girl could barely walk. When I asked her, she could only motion me to follow.

I followed her to her room and looked thru the peephole.

On the bench was a team of six midget wrestlers... 3 on the seat and 3 on the back of the seat waiting for the show 😂😂😂😂
If I worked at a ****o store it would have stunted my growth so to speak ....
 
My Old Man was into surprises. He'd pull in the driveway and ask us to help him get something outta his truck. It would be a gocart or a scooter of some kind. No helmets, no knee pads, no elbow pads. We survived just fine, and had a riot doing it.
My Daddy built me a street racer. It was made with 2x4's, baby coach wheels, a wooden crate.

I steered it with reins (!) and my feet.

Now, before one of you starts thinkin' about "Hoohah! No motor, eh? Kid's toy."

Roses are red, violets are blue. I've got five fingers, the middle one's for you.

Try this: This was in the Forties. A motor was not needed: Gravity was cheap, and far more dependable. Helmets were not even worn by fighter pilots. The runway for my street racer was dubbed, "Suicide Hill".

Lemme describe Suicide Hill. Model T drivers had to get a run going to get up the hill. TINS. BTW: Old cars -- even old by our kid standards at the time -- were common at that time. Remember: No cars were manufactured during the war. I saw cars with wooden spokes.

Back to Suicide Hill: It took forever to pull the racer to the top (1/4 mile). But once there, I'd be eager to climb into the seat/crate, carefully raise one foot at a time to the steering bar, and sorta lean forward...

...And off I'd go. It was important to stay in one "lane" <-- Not a paved road. The "lanes" were where the left/right tires of all vehicles went.

Within five seconds, the wind would cause tears to stream back. The world became a shaking blur***

***A good way to picture it is to look at WWII strafing films, where they vibrate and blur.

I dunno what speed the racer got to... fast enough to get kilt, fer sure -- but it was livin' on the edge, no error!

My record was three turns. Most of the time it was one and done. Even at that tender age, I knew I wuz casting dice.
 

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