The Original Old Farts Club

[joeb631a]

 

[Bubba]

They looked like they did a lot of insulating with out a suit or appropriate head wear

You got the hat too? Well. I thought it a touch gawdy. Now, I too, must get the hat. This party is blowing out of proportion now.

 

[Bubba]

You get bit in that skinny little *** of yours, I ain't suckin' out the poison!

"What did the doctor say? He said you are gonna die!" (snake bit on private parts and nether regions)

 

[joeb631a]

You got the hat too? Well. I thought it a touch gawdy. Now, I too, must get the hat. This party is blowing out of proportion now.

Its what sets apart from all the other groups! that and bingo

 

[NewbOldster]

Thats right, we are just used to the things we eat. Pigs are very smart as well

Bubba

Pigs are smart! They have memories, too.

 

[NewbOldster]

Now this is by any means meant as derogatory or should be misconstrued as a insult.
bless your hearts..

Southern FOLKS​

Southern FOLKS know their summer weather report: Humidity Humidity Humidity Southern FOLKS know their vacation spots: The beach The rivuh The creek Southern WOMEN know everybody's first name: Honey Darlin' Shugah Southern WOMEN know the movies that speak to their hearts: Fried Green Tomatoes Driving Miss Daisy Steel Magnolias Gone With The Wind Southern FOLKS know their religions: Baptist Methodist Football Southern FOLKS know their cities dripping with Southern charm: Chawl'stn S'vanah Foat Wuth N'awlins Addlanna Southern WOMEN know their elegant gentlemen: Men in uniform Men in tuxedos Rhett Butler Southern girls know their prime real estate: The Mall The Country Club The Beauty Salon Southern girls know the 3 deadly sins: Having bad hair and nails Having bad manners Cooking bad food Only a Southerner knows the difference between a hissie fit and a conniption fit, and that you don't "HAVE" them, you "PITCH" them. Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, turnip greens, peas, beans, etc., make up"a mess." Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of"yonder." Only a Southerner knows exactly how long"directly" is, as in: "Going to town, be back directly." ("Dreckly" in my family) Even Southern babies know that "Gimme some sugar"is not a request for the white, granular, sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl in the middle of the table. All Southerners know exactly when "by and by" is. They might not use the term, but they know the concept well. Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of solace for a neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a big bowl of cold potato salad. If the neighbor's trouble is a real crisis, they also know to add a large banana puddin'! Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference between"right near"and "a right fer piece." They also know that "just down the road" can be 1 mile or 20. Only a Southerner both knows and understands the difference between a redneck, a good ol' boy, and po' white trash. No true Southerner would ever assume that the car with the flashing turn signal is actually going to make a turn. A Southerner knows that"fixin" can be used as a noun, a verb, or an adverb. Only Southerners make friends while standing in lines, .... and when we're "in line", we talk to everybody! Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will discover they're related, even if only by marriage. In the South,y'all is singular, all y'all is plural. Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat them. Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon, grits, biscuits, and coffee are perfectly wonderful; that red eye gravy is also a breakfast food; and that fried green tomatoes are not a breakfast food. When you hear someone say, "Well, I caught myself lookin'," you know you are in the presence of a genuine Southerner! Only true Southerners say "sweet tea" and"sweet milk." Sweet tea indicates the need for sugar and lots of it -- we do not like our tea unsweetened. "Sweet milk" means you don't want buttermilk. And a true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at little old ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say,"Bless her heart"... and go your own way. To those of you who are still a little embarrassed by your Southerness: Take two tent revivals and a dose of sausage gravy and call me in the morning, bless your heart! And to those of you who are still having a hard time understanding all this Southern stuff.....bless your hearts, I hear they're fixin' to have classes on Southernness as a second language! Southern girls know men may come and go, but friends are fahevah ! Now Shugah, send this to someone who was raised in the South or wish they had been! If you're a Northern transplant, bless your little heart, fake it. We know you got here as fast as you could

"Only a Southerner both knows and understands the difference between a redneck, a good ol' boy, and po' white trash."

Born and bred southerner. I graduated high school while living in a 10X50 trailer with my two sisters and both parents - dogs, outdoor cats, horses, pigs, cows. And lots of work.

A Redneck is just a Good Old Boy that won't hurt you less'n you force him to. I'm White Trash PROUD, beeches!

 

[NewbOldster]

dogster: I have seen this many times --
View attachment 344600

"Now, boiled dog is greasy, I'll admit -- but downright tasty." <-- Jack Crabb (Little Big Man)

I tried dog meat when I was in Korea. I'd eat it again if I ever got hungry enough I guess...though it wasn't that great, and I ain't been that hungry yet. They called it kegogi. A few years later I got a GSD and named him Kegogi - Keg for short.

That's the dog that guarded the naked guy who was digging through the trash can in my house until the cops got there.

 

[NewbOldster]

One thing I noticed from my times in the South; A southerner has more manners in their little finger than a Yankee does in their whole soul and body. If you're walking down the street in a small town in the south, a man walking down the opposite side of the street will smile and wave to you. You can ride in an elevator from the ground floor up to the 12th with a Yankee, and they won't even make eye contact.
Only negative thing I noticed in the south is that the only thing they have to talk about all day is what YOU did all day. Lotta small town gossip.

If that ain't Barbara, I'll eat your hat!

I've eaten dog meat on several occasions. I had an apprentice that lived in Sagnasty that would bring some of the most delicious tamales that you've ever had. They were dog meat. Very tasty.
I couldn't imagine chasing one down and killing it for food, but if offered, I'd eat it.

If that ain't Barbara Eden, I'll eat her...hat.

 

[SubmarineGirl]

I’m sure I ate dog meat once at a good pacific islander friends place once. He lived on a big piece of property in a trailer and always had 10-15 dogs, never the same ones around. He had a five gallon bucket of what appeared to be beef all spiced up with delicious Pacific Islander deliciousness. He was making kabobs which we all ate and it was very good. I also ate my first fish heads and rice that day which his aunt made and was remarkably clean and yummy.

 

[Bubba]

I tried dog meat when I was in Korea. I'd eat it again if I ever got hungry enough I guess...though it wasn't that great, and I ain't been that hungry yet. They called it kegogi. A few years later I got a GSD and named him Kegogi - Keg for short.

That's the dog that guarded the naked guy who was digging through the trash can in my house until the cops got there.

Looking for worm socks perhaps?

 

[joeb631a]

Just got summoned to do things
It is my duty or suffer

 

[Bubba]

I’m sure I ate dog meat once at a good pacific islander friends place once. He lived on a big piece of property in a trailer and always had 10-15 dogs, never the same ones around. He had a five gallon bucket of what appeared to be beef all spiced up with delicious Pacific Islander deliciousness. He was making kabobs which we all ate and it was very good. I also ate my first fish heads and rice that day which his aunt made and was remarkably clean and yummy.

Why didnt they eat the other part of the fish? Is it like a broth made with, fish heads?

 

[SubmarineGirl]

Why didnt they eat the other part of the fish? Is it like a broth made with, fish heads?

Both were available on the plate. His aunt told me to take the body if I wanted to there was much more meat on it. I chose the heads because I knew there would probably never be another opportunity to do it where I trusted the source. They were not boiled but fried in oil with no breading. Very crispy and she was right there was not much meat on them. I didn’t suck the eyeballs out like I would the head of a crawdad but I’m sure some do…

 

[NewbOldster]

Looking for worm socks perhaps?

I think it was called "speedballing" or "highballing" - he and a companion were mixing heroin and cocaine and injecting it.
They burgled another house and his buddy got caught. I was out and came home around 10PM to this naked Charles Manson lookalike digging through my kitchen trash can.

I guess the drugs makes you hot (hence the naked) and drive you out your ever-lovin' mind (hence the breaking and entering and trash-can-digging).

I know this - the little fvcker's d ick was limp when they dragged him out to the patrol car in handcuffs! LOL

Freakin' loser.

 

[NewbOldster]

Both were available on the plate. His aunt told me to take the body if I wanted to there was much more meat on it. I chose the heads because I knew there would probably never be another opportunity to do it where I trusted the source. They were not boiled but fried in oil with no breading. Very crispy and she was right there was not much meat on them. I didn’t suck the eyeballs out like I would the head of a crawdad but I’m sure some do…

I used to work with a Jamaican, originally from Kingston. He grew up shoeless and in abject poverty.
He'd suck the eyes out of fish heads (smoked Trout) at our annual Christmas Party just to mess with the kids. LOL

 

[Unca Walt]

I’m sure I ate dog meat once at a good pacific islander friends place once. He lived on a big piece of property in a trailer and always had 10-15 dogs, never the same ones around. He had a five gallon bucket of what appeared to be beef all spiced up with delicious Pacific Islander deliciousness. He was making kabobs which we all ate and it was very good. I also ate my first fish heads and rice that day which his aunt made and was remarkably clean and yummy.

I love fish heads and rice. With a side of curry goat. I gots a neighbor a few hunnert feet down the road who sometimes throws "block" parties and makes it.

 

[NewbOldster]

I love fish heads and rice. With a side of curry goat. I gots a neighbor a few hunnert feet down the road who sometimes throws "block" parties and makes it.

I like...rice.

 

[NewbOldster]

Just got summoned to do things
It is my duty or suffer

Such is the strain of spousery.

 

[Unca Walt]

wise words kevinn

i believe ALL of Unca Walts stories….

for the most part , i believe everyone

why shouldn’t I?

and if I don’t believe someone’s story , I may ask them a few questions in a respectful and honorable way , try and get some facts , try to look at things from their perspective

there ain’t another human being who shoots straighter than Walt , not a more generous and compassionate human being than Walt…..

only thing me and Walt argue about is the moon landing….he has some very compelling arguments with “ evidence” that have really made me think

i wish Walt was more at liberty to talk about his distinguished military career and other adventures

i just have to be content by reading his books about war and stuff like that , some deep nom de plume stuff

Salute

Wow.

 

[Hippie420]

My foray with fish is a can of tuna once or twice a year.